WTF news stories

THE BESTEST STUFFS OF THE EVERS!!11!
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die
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WTF news stories

Post by die » Thu Apr 28, 2005 5:56 pm

try this shit:

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20050428/ap_ ... NlYwNlbg--


BANGKOK, Thailand - Jack Osbourne, the chubby, bespectacled son for former shock-rocker Ozzy Osbourne, underwent almost four weeks of training and colonic irrigations before entering the ring against a veteran Thai kickboxer.

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The result: a second round knockout win to the teenage television personality.

Ozzy and Sharon Osbourne, respectively the muddled patriarch and prickly matriarch of the family whose life was documented in the hit reality show "The Osbournes," flew in to see Wednesday night's big bout, which was over in less than four minutes, a family associate said.

Jack, 19, who underwent drug rehabilitation in 2003, came to Thailand to learn the traditional sport — called muaythai — to help him get in shape for an upcoming rock climbing expedition in the U.S. said Ed Stobart, a Briton traveling with the young Osbourne.

"He has been training very hard for three and-a-half weeks," Stobart told The Associated Press in a telephone interview on Thursday. "His mum and dad flew in on what is essentially a private visit to see him and they're having a family day today."

Jack spent four days at the elite Fairtex Muaythai Fitness Camp near Bangkok, the Thai capital, before traveling to the popular tourist island of Pha-Ngan for "a complete physical detox, which was basically twice-daily massive colonic irrigations to kind of flush himself out of toxins," Stobart said.

Jack returned to the boxing camp for 10 more days of training before facing off against an experienced Thai boxer known only as "The Man."

With Ozzy and Sharon cheering him on, Jack knocked his opponent out eight seconds into the second round, said Philip Wong, Jack's trainer. Muaythai fights usually have five three-minute rounds.

"I was very impressed with his training," said Wong. "He behaved and he trained so hard for it ... he lost 20 pounds when he was with me."

But Jack, quoted by The Nation newspaper, said he needed to lose another 10 pounds to achieve his best fighting weight.

Jack took up muaythai after deciding to clean up his alcohol and drug habits and get healthy, an endeavor supported by his father, who also gave up drinking last year, the Nation reported.

"At first mum and dad were a little concerned," Jack was quoted as saying. "But once they came here and saw the training programs — and saw for themselves that I was mentally and physically well prepared — they were very cool about it all."

Jack said he enjoys sports that test his mind, body and spirit.

"I'd have to say that muaythai is something special. It's really demanding and it's becoming popular all around the world," he said.

Jack owes his fame to the MTV show "The Osbournes," which follows the lives of Ozzy, the former lead singer of legendary British heavy metal band Black Sabbath, and his wife, son and daughter. The show is in its final season.


:shock:
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Repo Man
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Post by Repo Man » Thu Apr 28, 2005 6:40 pm

I am still in shock to find out that Tom Cruise is slicing Katie Holmes.


What's next?
Pacino and Lizzy McGuire?
Nicholson and my beloved Amanda Bynes?


And Happy Birthday to Jessica Alba's fine bottom.
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PhreakyMex
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Post by PhreakyMex » Thu Apr 28, 2005 7:11 pm

truly WTF?
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die
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Post by die » Fri Apr 29, 2005 7:04 pm

try this:
Flicka is running out of friends.

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According to the American Humane Society, two horses have died in just two weeks on the set of the upcoming My Friend Flicka remake, starring Tim McGraw.

A rodeo horse died Monday while shooting a "wild horse race scene" at the Hansen Dam Equestrian Center in Los Angeles' San Fernando Valley, prompting production to briefly shut down. The equine actor broke free from its handlers and tripped over a rope, breaking its neck. And a quarter horse was put down on Apr. 11 after it tripped during filming and broke its back leg.

American Humane Association spokeswoman Sara Spaulding said her organization is conducting an investigation of 20th Century Fox to see if the Flicka filmmakers are following animal-friendly guidelines. The movie is being produced the studio's Fox 2000 division.

The movie brain trust, meanwhile, has issued a statement, saying "we are terribly saddened by the events that occurred. The production has taken every possible precaution and safety measure in shooting scenes where horses are involved."

The City of Los Angeles' Department of Animal Services allowed filming to resume on Tuesday, and the AHA investigation continues. But the production will no longer be able to use wild mustangs previously employed on the shoot, according a spokesman for the department.

But many animal-rights activists say the AHA probe may be compromised because the group is paid by the Screen Actors Guild to monitor animal use in films.

"I am mortified. Poor horses. They've gotta stop this," Kathy Riordan, a member of the Los Angeles Animal Services Commission told UPI. "I personally think there is a major conflict of interest when the entity responsible for monitoring an industry is supported by it. Any way you look at it, [the AHA] gets paid by Hollywood and there's something wrong with that."

My Friend Flicka is a remake of the 1943 Roddy McDowall. The new version, starring McGraw, Maria Bello and Alison Lohman, is scheduled to hit theaters in February.

"I am mortified. Poor horses. They've gotta stop this" :lol:

BEASTILIATY!
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Post by die » Fri Apr 29, 2005 10:33 pm

oh snaps! must be slow news day...


School Mistakes Huge Burrito for a Weapon


CLOVIS, N.M. - A call about a possible weapon at a middle school prompted police to put armed officers on rooftops, close nearby streets and lock down the school. All over a giant burrito.


Someone called authorities Thursday after seeing a boy carrying something long and wrapped into Marshall Junior High.

The drama ended two hours later when the suspicious item was identified as a 30-inch burrito filled with steak, guacamole, lettuce, salsa and jalapenos and wrapped inside tin foil and a white T-shirt.

"I didn't know whether to laugh or cry," school Principal Diana Russell said.

State police, Clovis police and the Curry County Sheriff's Department arrived at the school shortly after 8:30 a.m. They searched the premises and determined there was no immediate danger.

In the meantime, more than 30 parents, alerted by a radio report, descended on the school. Visibly shaken, they gathered around in a semi-circle, straining their necks, awaiting news.

"There needs to be security before the kids walk through the door," said Heather Black, whose son attends the school.

After the lockdown was lifted but before the burrito was identified as the culprit, parents pulled 75 students out of school, Russell said.

Russell said the mystery was solved after she brought everyone in the school together in the auditorium to explain what was going on.

"The kid was sitting there as I'm describing this (report of a student with a suspicious package) and he's thinking, 'Oh, my gosh, they're talking about my burrito.'"

Afterward, eighth-grader Michael Morrissey approached her.

"He said, 'I think I'm the person they saw,'" Russell said.

The burrito was part of Morrissey's extra-credit assignment to create commercial advertising for a product.

"We had to make up a product and it could have been anything. I made up a restaurant that specialized in oddly large burritos," Morrissey said.

After students heard the description of what police were looking for, he and his friends began to make the connection. He then took the burrito to the office.

"The police saw it and everyone just started laughing. It was a laughter of relief," Morrissey said.

"Oh, and I have a new nickname now. It's Burrito Boy."
all this from the main news on Yahoo. :lol:
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RobotJerk
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Post by RobotJerk » Mon May 02, 2005 9:09 pm

That kid put steak, jalepenos, AND guacamole in that thing?

It wasn't a weapon, but the burrito was definitely loaded.
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Post by Shwiggie » Mon May 02, 2005 9:21 pm

If anybody ate it, they'd become a Weapon of Ass Destruction. Talk about your chemical warfare....
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Post by PhreakyMex » Wed May 11, 2005 4:13 pm

The Ticker, May 11
May 11, 2005

OUT OF THIS WORLD

The May 19 opening of Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith could cause headaches for employers, according to global outplacement firm Challenger, Gray & Christmas Inc. The company today released a report saying that absenteeism could cost employers as much as $627 million over the two workdays of the four-day opening weekend, as workers take off to see the film.
WTF?

Screw the price of oil going up... the price of bacon has gone up too!

http://www.wisconsinagconnection.com/st ... 68&yr=2005
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Post by $nave » Fri May 13, 2005 3:48 am

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Post by Sparkstalker » Mon May 16, 2005 6:06 pm

die wrote:oh snaps! must be slow news day...


School Mistakes Huge Burrito for a Weapon


CLOVIS, N.M. - A call about a possible weapon at a middle school prompted police to put armed officers on rooftops, close nearby streets and lock down the school. All over a giant burrito.
all this from the main news on Yahoo. :lol:
I found out last week that I've got a cousin who's wife actually works at that school...so I appropriated Shwiggie's chemical warfare/weapon of ass destruction line :lol:
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Post by $nave » Tue May 17, 2005 5:35 pm

http://www.thejacksonchannel.com/irresi ... etail.html
Woman Beats Rap For Boyfriend's Sex Injury
Appeals Court Says Girlfriend Not Liable

BOSTON -- Make love at your own risk. That's the gist of a ruling from a Massachusetts state appeals court.

A man only identified as John Doe in court papers sued a former lover. He contended the woman suddenly changed positions during sex, fracturing his you-know-what.

The man had emergency surgery in September 1994 and says he's been unable to satisfactorily perform since.

The court papers say he hasn't responded to medication or counseling.

The appeals court ruled the woman isn't legally responsible for her boyfriend's injuries. A lawyer for the man said they may file an appeal.
:o :atch:
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die
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Post by die » Tue May 17, 2005 7:20 pm

no hung jury?
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PhreakyMex
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Post by PhreakyMex » Tue May 17, 2005 7:25 pm

One word.


OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!! :o
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Shwiggie
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Post by Shwiggie » Wed May 18, 2005 1:42 pm

I reread the first post, but after reading the last story, it made me think of the first one's city....Bangkok!

What'd she do, a Diamond Cutter on his Total Package? And what bone does he claim she fractured, anyway? Or is the term "boner" now legally and medically admissable?
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Post by $nave » Wed May 25, 2005 4:21 am

http://www.news-press.com/apps/pbcs.dll ... 24006/1075

"Happy Father's Day" written on a duct tape dildo found on the side of a highway = WTF
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